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Topic: Purses are a mistake, especially for older people< Next Oldest | Next Newest >
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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 1:22 pm  Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Yesterday, as my wife and I were walking into a store, a man and woman were walking out and as they passed us, the woman started sprinting and thrust her arm through the shoulder strap and took off with my wife's purse. I chased them for about a quarter mile, through several apartment complexes and into an alley where I gave out. At one point I was within a few steps of them, but couldn’t keep up the pace.

So, we’re unsettled, my wife has a few bruises, dealing with credit card and related issues, re-keying the locks, getting new chips in the car keys, and so on.

As we’ve gotten older I’ve tried to get my wife to quit carrying a purse. To me, purses are just crazy – a sign that says here’s the goodies, and not too hard to grab. She doesn’t carry a purse when we’re traveling, but here in Dallas, even in the inner city it feels safer, I guess. Not now.

Lest anyone think I’m making a grrrr post about my wife behind her back, well, I guess I am; but not casting stones as I’m the guy who left a daypack with a laptop in it in the Hong Kong airport (got it back – what better place to leave something valuable). Just grrrr in general.

If I’d been carrying a pistol I would have shot them, but I seldom carry anymore and I’m fine with that. It’s not that I see any particular value in their toxic lives. I’m sitting here, really thinking about this, and in the end, I’m glad I wasn’t carrying.


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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 1:27 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

I carry a bike messenger bag on most urban traveling and I just always have the strap across to my opposite shoulder. Largely for balance and weight distribution but in some small part so it can't be grabbed in that fashion.

Glad neither she nor you were hurt.
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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 1:41 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

I wonder if you could get one of those dye packs they use in banks....put it in a pocket on her purse and tell her to never open that pocket.....
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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 1:42 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

I'm glad she's safe.  Being assaulted like that is a frightening experience.

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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 1:47 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

I somewhat agree Buddero.
My grandmother, who at the time was in her 60s, was walking in Rome when a thief darted from a crowd & grabbed her purse.  She attempted to let it go, but it snagged on her shoulder and dislocated it.  When she hit the ground, she broke her wrist in several places.
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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 1:48 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

That stinks, I'm sorry it happened to you. I get so angry at people that somehow think they're entitled to something that someone else worked hard for.  

Maybe a different style of purse is safer than another?  I typically either have a very small wristlet or a cross-body style that I think would be more difficult to break away.


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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 2:28 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Hi...


What a terrible experience...!! Glad that there were no serious injuries to you or your wife. Wish you had been able to catch the rats.

And now...with our infinate hindsight...we can realize that a purse, messenger bag, shoulder bag, etc. is best carried with the strap across the opposite shoulder. NOTE: they now make these items with a cable threaded through the strap, which helps prevent 'slice-and-run' incidents.

Hope the cops can track them down.
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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 2:35 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE


(Pathfinder1 @ Jan. 16 2013, 2:28 pm)
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And now...with our infinate hindsight...we can realize that a purse, messenger bag, shoulder bag, etc. is best carried with the strap across the opposite shoulder.

That's a double edged sword.  If it's across your other shoulder, I now have a handle to hold you in place.  Thw worst beating I ever saw in person was a bike messenger that was assaulted by someone that grabbed him from behind by messenger bag and dragged him off of his bike by it.

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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 2:41 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

For me, I just plain dislike carrying things.  Even when I have to carry an umbrella, I buy the shortest, lightest one I can find -- so it fits in my trouser pockets.

Women generally need to carry more... but I bet if they apply the principles of "backpacking light" to their everyday lives -- leaving stuff at home, carrying only the essentials -- and making each do multiple functions to the extent possible -- and then selecting only the lightest and most compact options -- plus selecting clothing that incorporate pockets -- then they too can venture out hands free...

Buddero -- sorry to hear about the purse snatching.  When stuff like this happens, oftentimes, the psychological aspect -- repeatedly reliving the terrifying moment in our minds -- is worse than the material stuff lost.


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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 3:16 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Ben, that's my approach, but I do need a wallet, and there's no room in my jeans for one :D. I carry a wallet on a string, in effect, and carry it cross-shoulder, but it's still vulnerable (though maybe less obvious and harder to grab).  Of course a wallet in your back pocket is subject to removal as well.

If I need more than my wallet, I carry a backpack, or a messenger bag (usually this means I'm hauling books to the library or swimsuit to the gym).

Of course, an argument could be made for carrying a very heavy purse--and knocking the scumbag flat with it :D


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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 3:18 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

:(
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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 4:37 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Thanks for the responses.

Here's what we carry $, pp, etc. while traveling: http://www.rei.com/product....ey-belt

Millions of people around the world carry $ in a little inside pocket sewn into a shirt, etc.

But whatever, it's really a drag to have a (even a small) crime committed on oneself. We're off to the car dealership where the key changes will be $160+.  Grumble, whine, sigh, snarl.


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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 4:44 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE


(RebeccaD @ Jan. 16 2013, 12:16 pm)
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Ben, that's my approach, but I do need a wallet, and there's no room in my jeans for one .

This might help -- it's what I've been using for the past two years.  Mine is still almost as good as new!

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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 4:45 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

I have always carried my purse across my chest, with a wide strap, that is designed to be hard to cut. Or I wear a 2 strap ladies backpack purse, also hard to get off.

Sucks though. Out here every month a lady or two gets her purse grabbed out of a cart at the store. I see people walk away from their purses ALL the time in Costco and Safeway, I just don't get that!!


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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 4:47 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE


(RebeccaD @ Jan. 16 2013, 12:16 pm)
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Of course, an argument could be made for carrying a very heavy purse--and knocking the scumbag flat with it :D

A very strong argument indeed!  Watch this elderly woman bashing not one, not two, but six robbers mercilessly with her purse...  Notice the police showed up after  the robbers started running away...



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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 5:03 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

I remember that! And think that my refusal to haul a big handbag leaves me unable to emulate her!

I have to say they seem like some of the less competent burglars I've ever seen.


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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 6:15 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Buddero, sorry you had to experience this. I hope you and your wife get over this soon.  It is so sad that crime is so rampant these days. Peace to you.
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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 7:51 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Thanks Oldnolder, et al.

I've been thinking about this, needless to say. From my point of view the key points are:

In my opinion carrying a purse makes one more vulnerable to assault such as what I described. A purse (a) tells the world that here is where the valuables are, which is a fundamental security mistake and (b) is easily stolen.

There are differences between valuables (cash, credit card) and other stuff (photos, makeup, multi-function tool, etc.). It's a cultural oddity that women seem to feel obligated to carry their valuables in this manner vs. concealed.

Older people are at increased risk of being targeted by criminals, including purse snatchers as above (and con artists, and others I'm sure). We also pay a heavier price for physical violence due to diminished physical capacities - so it becomes even more important to avoid violence.


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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 8:16 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Rule number 1: stay out of the city.

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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 16 2013, 9:06 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE


(Ben2World @ Jan. 16 2013, 2:41 pm)
QUOTE
Women generally need to carry more... but I bet if they apply the principles of "backpacking light" to their everyday lives -- leaving stuff at home, carrying only the essentials -- and making each do multiple functions to the extent possible -- and then selecting only the lightest and most compact options -- plus selecting clothing that incorporate pockets -- then they too can venture out hands free...

Last year I started carrying a diaper bag, so yeah, no room for a purse anymore.  I started carrying the wallet I take backpacking (one of these) with only a couple of cards and my license inside.  It fits in my pocket.  I have a chapstick holder on my keychain.  My cell phone fits in my other pocket.  Everything else is optional - really!  As long as the kid has diapers and wipes, lol

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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 17 2013, 1:23 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

About a year ago I started leaving my purse (hidden well or locked in the trunk) in the car when I go into the grocery store.  I take the credit card I need in my pocket and I don't have to watch the cart all the time. . . it's so much easier to shop without a purse dangling around on my shoulder.

Anyone who grabbed my purse would be sorely disappointed anyway!  No cash, ever, and anything else of "value" is either home or on my person.
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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 17 2013, 9:43 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

I never work at the same place two days in a row so my purse has a few essentials that are really worthless to anyone, a hairbrush, tampons, carmex, gum, advil and antacids, pens, more like a desk drawer really, so I'd laugh to think of anyone digging through it for money.  I'm a substitute teacher with two teenagers and one is in college, there isn't much of value even in my house.

I know I talk about Flylady.net a lot because she has helped me a lot, and her site has a wallet that is thin and pocket friendly for just this reason

http://shop.flylady.net/pages/FlyShop_Wallet.asp


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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 17 2013, 11:56 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE


(buddero @ Jan. 16 2013, 10:22 am)
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If I’d been carrying a pistol I would have shot them, but I seldom carry anymore and I’m fine with that. It’s not that I see any particular value in their toxic lives. I’m sitting here, really thinking about this, and in the end, I’m glad I wasn’t carrying.

I don't know if you have ever suffered a theft like this before, but you should be aware of how this can affect both you and your wife.  

I have been the victim of theft, physical battery, and several home burgleries.  Oddly, it wasthe  burgleries which were the most difficult to come to terms with.  I had dreams of killing burglers and my thoughts during the day often ran in that direction as well.  I finally just had to let it go because I didn't want that kind of crap running through my head.  Anyway, just a heads up.  YMMV

Sorry this happened to you and your wife.  Take care.

Rumi


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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 17 2013, 4:04 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Thanks Rumi. Yes, it's a bad thing to have a crime committed on one. I've been robbed at gunpoint, but never burgled.

I was worried about the effects of this on my wife. Today I got a clue. She wanted to go to the store. There were other, closer options, but she wanted to go back to the store where it happened. Parked in the same spot and walked in the same door. Shopped. Left.

MY WIFE, XENA! Oh Hell Yes!


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PostIcon Posted on: Jan. 17 2013, 5:04 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic.  Ignore posts   QUOTE

I'm so sorry that happened! I generally just carry my wallet in one pocket, cell phone in the other. All of my purses except for 1 are the messenger-style. The one that isn't is my court bag, so if someone really wants to steal copies of court files...have fun. I'm usually in a court house inside security with that one, so not too many worries.

That's awful. When we were in Italy I kept just my ID, 1 credit card, and cash in the front zipper pocket of my hiking pants.


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