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Topic: War with the neighbors, So bummed< Next Oldest | Next Newest >
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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 12:10 am  Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

I am an animal lover, but really bummed at the rift between my neighbors and I over our dogs. I live in a townhouse and our front doors are side by side. They have a 20lb poodle mix that has gotten loose and attacked my 60 lb Airedale 4 times now. (My dog is ALWAYS on a leash) Of course, it won't do much damage, but it's made my dog aggressive towards him and if I let her defend herself the small dog will end up hurt or dead. The last time I got between them, I ended up with a good bite on the leg. Tonight, I was able to get my dog back indoors and when the neighbor finally came out to get her dog, I said "you really need to keep that dog under control and indoors." I got a "f_ck you" in return.

So I filed a complaint with the HOA, which I should have done the last time it happened. I'm just so bummed to basically have a contentious relationship with my closest neighbors :(

I really hope this doesn't turn into a tit for tat where they run to the HOA for every little thing. Adding this to the list of things I dislike about home ownership!


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 12:13 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Got a smartphone? Record your next interchange: F-you and all.
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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 1:21 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

It's too late for this advice. But, I never complain about my neighbors. They raise pit bulls from pups and once a year there are always barking dogs.

But, that's okay. Neighbors know when you're not home and will know more about you than just about anyone. So, I let that stuff slide. They never complain when I turn music up to ear-bleed levels. No HOA here. And, nobody wants cops involved.


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 1:52 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Their dog bit you?

Report it. Next time it happens, it will get put down.


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 2:35 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

War? Ouch. Move. I like DD's advice -within reason, of course.

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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 5:38 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE


(obchristo @ Sep. 27 2013, 10:52 pm)
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Their dog bit you?

Report it. Next time it happens, it will get put down.

Agree. A certain amount of noise or such is one thing but getting bitten is way across the line.
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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 6:01 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

In black and white terms it's simple: getting bitten + douchey attitude = you owe them no kindness.

Having said that, however, I would perhaps make one last ditch effort to give them the chance to come around to a more responsible view.  As you mentioned, having a bad relationship with your neighbors isn't fun.

The fact that their dog bit you gives you leverage, so to speak.  You can let them know that they just passed the limit of your goodwill, and as much as you would hate to do so, you will be left with no choice but to take this to the next level (HOA, reporting the dog), unless they start managing the dog responsibly.

When we took a class in dealing with problem people at work, we were taught a good system for getting compliance is to offer the least desirable outcome first, and then offer a more reasonable alternative - what you actually want them to do.

You come off looking reasonable, and like you're willing to work with them.  You also still have all of the consequences in your back pocket in case they don't behave.


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 6:29 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Bear spray.

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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 7:05 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

One of the nice things about living in the country...
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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 7:18 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE


(Firedancer @ Sep. 28 2013, 12:10 am)
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The last time I got between them, I ended up with a good bite on the leg.

Maybe it was her own dog that bit her? I once tried to break up a dog fight and was bitten by my own dog, I'm sure in the frenzy it didn't know who/what it was biting.

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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 7:37 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE


(JRinGeorgia @ Sep. 28 2013, 7:18 am)
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(Firedancer @ Sep. 28 2013, 12:10 am)
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The last time I got between them, I ended up with a good bite on the leg.

Maybe it was her own dog that bit her? I once tried to break up a dog fight and was bitten by my own dog, I'm sure in the frenzy it didn't know who/what it was biting.

Yep - not sure who bit me, but based on the height, more likely my own dog.

I think I am going to carry some sort of pepper spray going forward - each time it all happens so fast, I go into mama bear mode and don't really have time to react.


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 8:34 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Now, I might offer a bit of different advice.  You have done everything under your control to keep a dog fight from happening.  You have kept your own dog under control, and have asked that they do the same.  Their response was less than agreeable, to the point of being hostile.  

I say, allow your dog to protect itself, even if their dog gets injured and requires vet care.  You have documented the aggressor with the HOA, and your dog defending itself is best left to the dog, particularly since it is the bigger dog.  The down side would be that you do not want your dog to become an aggressor.  

Perhaps spray would be better.  I would spray the poodle every time I saw it running loose, or until it learned not to come near me.  Do not wait for the fight to start, as then your dog is in the mix with the spray.  Carry it in the Ready position.  In your hand, with the safety off.

If you are really ready to use pepper spray, learn to keep an eye on the wind.  You do not want the spray blowing back in your face.


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 8:53 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Lot of contentions with neighbors.  My brother in law lived in a fairly rural 'burb around our central city and while weeding his lawn, a neighbor stopped in the road with a kid and pointing, said "... there's trash picking up trash."   The house had a normal grass lawn btw.  Anyhos, they had to put up with that type of stuff on a regular basis until moved out of town for a promotion.  

Americans are so contentious nowadays, I'm thinking it may pay to buy a house that is easy to resell in case your neighbors turn out to be the Manson family.


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 10:18 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Neighbors can either be a blessing or a nightmare. Good neighbors will watch your house while you are gone, feed you dog, etc...

Bad neighbors can make your life hell, only family members and coworkers could be worse.

I guess personally, I would have turned that poodle into a 20 pound football. Under our state law, you could have disposed of that animal. You have a right to protect your dog and yourself.

As far as being neighborly, it is pretty clear by the "f-you" they have no intention of being good neighbors. They are responsible for their dog, 100%. You have many options and the HOA is one of them. I give you this advice that I follow regularly. A quote from Teddy Roosevelt:

"Avoid hitting whenever honorably possible to do so, but never hit soft!"
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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 11:26 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Bear and pepper spray in close quarters can be very unpleasant for the user as well as the target.  Be careful.
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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 11:49 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

So sorry to hear you're going through this, Leigh. That's a pretty crummy neighbor. :(

I would also start keeping track of detailed encounters going forward. Your neighbor has shown that they really don't give a crap about anyone except for themselves.

Katy, as a puppy, was bitten on her nose by a dog, while stopped on a walk and talking. Didn't see it coming and it happened fast. I picked her up and immediately took her to the vet, but she was never really the same after that. I'm still not certain if I'm the instigator there.

But, now whenever she's on leash and in our hallways or around our building, she lunges, barks and goes nuts at other dogs. She sounds vicious, but mostly she's just afraid. There was a dog across the street in the yard with its owner a few months ago. My dog yanked so hard, she got away. The result? She went over and sniffed the other dog's butt. lol

She has no idea what to do with herself after going ballistic. Good for me! But others around (mostly non-dog owners) really don't understand.

I continue to make sure she gets plenty of socialization with other dogs. I think this is key. She's super submissive (although, you wouldn't know that just by walking by her) and she's finally figuring out how to tell other dogs she doesn't want to play.

I hope your problem gets resolved.

Oh, there is a product out there that is called Pet Corrector. It's basically very loud canned air. My trainer carries it with him whenever out on training walks and I've started carrying a can. It gets the attention of whatever is around.

http://www.amazon.com/Supplie....rrector
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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 11:56 am Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

I'm not sure if the incidence of this is up or I'm just hearing more stories. But I've been talking about it with friends here and then saw a letter to the editor. There seem to be more people with little dogs everywhere. And they take them into places like restaurants and grocery stores but they don't discipline them. A couple weeks ago I was walking my so s blind, two year old boxer mix. On my property on a leash. As I came through the trees I saw two women picking my blackberries and apples. One had a Rottweiler on a leash and one had three corgis on one leash. I kept walking toward them. Smiling, have no problem with people gathering the fruit this time of year. But as I got close one corgi slipped its collar and rushed in to attack my dog. He was baffled and just stood as the dog bit at him and I kicked it away. The women hesitated then the other one took both leashes and the one grabbed up the attacker. My dogs neck and belly were bleeding and they were like, no apologies just "why are you out here with a pittbull!"

Then my friend. An elderly widow who was walking her dog on a leash at the beach had a small dog circling and snapping at them at the beach and the man who owned it was saying "sorry, he's just too fast. I can't catch him"

But I lived next to neighbors who calmed the sherif everytime my car was too close to the property line or my parrot screamed. Nothing is harder than a home that feels like a war zone


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 5:54 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Some times dogs mysteriously disappear or even die.  No one knows why.  

Just saying.


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 5:59 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE


(hikerjer @ Sep. 28 2013, 5:54 pm)
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Some times dogs mysteriously disappear or even die.  No one knows why.  

Just saying.

And from such a sweet man................LOL, I love it.

jer = closet republican gun totein' Texan wannabe............ :laugh:


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 6:25 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

I like the pepper spray or canned air idea - you have the right to protect yourself and your dog.

Our neighbors had 2 big dogs that they left in a 4x8 kennel 24/7.  Rain/snow/intense  heat/no matter.  They just stayed back there and barked their lives away.  They especially liked to bark in the evenings, when we were trying to sleep.  Our neighbors are the type of people who stay up late partying, so they didn't care.  Oh, and this was in addition to 4 small dogs that lived in their garage, barking their lives away.  I talked to my neighbors and nicely and casually asked them to see if they could perhaps keep their dogs from barking... my hope as an animal lover was that perhaps they could also be persuaded to actually care for their dogs better, let them out to run around, walk them, socialize with them, and otherwise treat them better.  They just cussed at me.  

So I started waking up when my husband did, 3:30 am, and going into my backyard.  This would solicit the dogs barking.  I wasn't doing anything wrong, just hanging out in my yard, but the barking would wake up their household and they'd start yelling at the dogs and at each other.  I did this for a couple of weeks.  One day the kennel and the dogs were gone.


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 6:48 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE


(JimmyC @ Sep. 28 2013, 5:59 pm)
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(hikerjer @ Sep. 28 2013, 5:54 pm)
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Some times dogs mysteriously disappear or even die.  No one knows why.  

Just saying.

And from such a sweet man................LOL, I love it.

jer = closet republican gun totein' Texan wannabe............ :laugh:

Now don't go jumping to conclusions, Jimmy.  It'll only get you in trouble.

And BTW, I may be a lot of tings, but one thing I sure ain't is a Texan although I've got relatives there.


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 6:55 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

A simple solution: a spray bottle set on stream filled with 1/2 ammonia and 1/2 water.  Hit the dog in the face and all aggression evaporates.  The dog will avoid you after a couple of treatments.

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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 7:57 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

QUOTE
just stayed back there and barked their lives away.  They especially liked to bark in the evenings,

I like dogs but I can't abide the ones that bark just to make noise.


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 8:52 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE


(tarol @ Sep. 28 2013, 4:25 pm)
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....
So I started waking up when my husband did, 3:30 am, and going into my backyard.  This would solicit the dogs barking.  I wasn't doing anything wrong, just hanging out in my yard, but the barking would wake up their household and they'd start yelling at the dogs and at each other.  I did this for a couple of weeks.  One day the kennel and the dogs were gone.

That is Brilliant!

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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 8:56 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

NYS law allows you to immediately put down a dog that is threatening you, another human, or a domestic animal.

I've never had to do that, but after I have inform the irresponsible dog owner about the law they usually start controlling their beloved pet.
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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 10:53 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE


(hikerjer @ Sep. 28 2013, 2:54 pm)
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Some times dogs mysteriously disappear or even die.  No one knows why.  

Just saying.

I have seriously thought of starting a business for just such circumstances ... if you know what I mean.

Rumi


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(desert dweller @ Sep. 28 2013, 1:21 am)
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It's too late for this advice. But, I never complain about my neighbors. They raise pit bulls from pups and once a year there are always barking dogs.

But, that's okay. Neighbors know when you're not home and will know more about you than just about anyone. So, I let that stuff slide. They never complain when I turn music up to ear-bleed levels. No HOA here. And, nobody wants cops involved.

Best advice I've read yet....

Dogs just disappearing....well, that's the second best advice...

The three S's....Shoot, shovel, and shutup...


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 11:26 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

One thing I have learned the hard way is that if an incident does not get reported promptly to the authorities or some official agency, it didn't happen.  Complaining about past incidents is less than useless.  So whatever athority/agency is proper needs to get reported to every occurance from here on out.  Only be reporting each incident can you establish a pattern of insufficient control over their animal. Video recording is a good idea but may be difficult while also trying to control your own dog.

Realistically your only other alternative is to accept their dog's behavior and keep your mouth shut.  That doesn't sound like a good alternative so you are left with reporting each incident.  You have to pick what you are going to go to wall over and this sounds like one of those.

Sorry for your problem and I sincerely hope this can resolve easily.  Meantime take care.

Rumi


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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 28 2013, 11:43 pm Skip to the previous post in this topic. Skip to the next post in this topic. Ignore posts   QUOTE

Bad neighbors suck!  It can make things miserable.
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PostIcon Posted on: Sep. 29 2013, 12:42 am Skip to the previous post in this topic.  Ignore posts   QUOTE

We have a private group on FB for our large (private) neighborhood. Yesterday morning a lady watched her neighbor hit its pug so hard the dog quit moving, and left it in the front yard. She was scared. She posted it, we all persuaded her to call the cops.
Turns out it was good she did, he was extremely angry and didn't take it well when the AC officer showed up as well.

It wasn't her dog - and the dog might be annoying - but it didn't deserve to be nearly killed by its own owner :(

So anyhow, 'burb living can be OK if people look out for each other. I'm just glad I don't have a petty thief living next door like back in the day, a few years back.


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